When you coparent, it’s always preferable if the two of you can come to an agreement about what’s best for your child. But sometimes, agreement just is not possible, and when it comes to your child’s schooling, few things are more important. The choices you make about schooling will change your child’s life forever as well as have a profound impact on your family dynamics. A child custody lawyer in San Mateo, CA can help you understand how the courts are going to view the evidence in your case and present a careful plan that shows why your choice for your child is the best one.
How Do Judges Handle Disagreements About School Choice in Custody Cases?
Mediation
The first step when parents disagree is usually for the court to order them into mediation. Mediation is not ordered in absolutely every case, but it is very common, and you should expect it. Mediation is an opportunity for you and the child’s other parent to take a collaborative approach to dealing with this issue and reach an agreement that you can both see as in the best interest of your child. Mediation is less adversarial and usually leads to better relationships among family members.
If you go to mediation, you should expect to have a trained mediator take the lead to help you discuss things with the other parent and reach your decision. The mediator is not on anyone’s side. The mediator’s job is to help both of you communicate more effectively and stay focused. They will help you avoid getting caught up in emotions or in issues that have nothing to do with the actual question at hand.
Court Intervention
Mediation is wonderful, and it can be very effective, but it doesn’t solve every issue. If you and the child’s other parent have to go to court over this matter, you can expect the court to take it very seriously, since your child’s education is such an important thing. However, having the judge decide is a last resort.
Factors the Judge Will Consider in Making a Decision
The Child’s Best Interests
Your child’s best interests will be the overriding consideration for the judge. When parents separate, most elements of their separation or divorce should be considered in light of what is equitable to them. But when it comes to anything that touches on the child, the best interests of the child overrides any considerations of the parents.
This doesn’t mean that your considerations mean nothing: it just means that the judge must decide based on what’s in the child’s best interests rather than coming to a compromise in this respect.
Quality of the Respective Schools
Obviously, it matters a great deal how good the schools in question are. The judge will want to look at the academic performance of each school, the resources that are offered to parents and students, and what kind of extracurriculars may be available to determine what’s best for your child to thrive, educationally.
The Child’s Needs
Another key consideration is which school is best for your child’s needs. This may be a hard question to answer if the schools are similarly equipped and your child does not have many special needs, but many times there is a swaying factor.
For example, if your child has been attending one of these schools successfully for years and is thriving there, the court will likely not want to see you make a change. On the other hand, if the opposite is true, and your child has been doing poorly at a school, then it may be time for a change. If your child has special needs, the judge will consider which school is best equipped to meet them.
How Much Travel Time Is Involved
Another key question is how far the school is from the child’s primary residence. The main question here is the kind of impact it would make on the child’s routine to go to one school or the other. Even if one school is somewhat better than the other, if going there would require a huge change to your child’s daily schedule, the court may be reluctant to order a change.
How Involved You Both Are
Another question is how involved each parent is in their child’s education. If the parents are equally involved, this may not matter much, but if one parent has sole physical custody, and one of the schools is close enough to allow that parent to stay deeply involved in their child’s educational upbringing and the other school is not, this may weigh heavily in the judge’s mind.
The Child’s Preferences
The court will be considering your child’s preference, particularly if they are older. While the court can ask a younger child about this, a younger child’s opinion doesn’t carry much weight. But if your child is 13 or 14 years old, then their preferences will be important to the judge, particularly if they have mature reasons for preferring one school over another. If your child can articulate good reasons why they prefer one school, such as helpful teachers or close relationships with friends, this will be an important consideration.
Extracurriculars and Opportunities
Another question is what kind of opportunities the school offers beyond just the basic education. If one school or the other will offer a lot more growth opportunities for your child, this may sway the judge in favor of that school, all other things being equal.
Impact on Family Relationships
The judge will also consider whether the child has close relationships with siblings or other family, such as grandparents. If the child does have these relationships, and they are long-standing and healthy, then a judge may be reluctant to agree to a change of school that would disrupt these relationships, particularly if the child is younger.
Work With a Child Custody Lawyer in San Mateo, CA
Good parents always want what’s best for their children, and if you feel strongly about the best schooling situation for your child, it’s important to present a strong and well-evidenced case before the court. An experienced lawyer will help you do just that. Contact us today at the Seeley Family Law Practice, APC for help anywhere in the Bay Area.